Premutos review by The Grim Ringler

Premutos

To even the hardest of hardcore horror and gore nerds there comes a time when blood isnt enough. Sure, sure, we all love to see a little of the red stuff splashed around and sprayed on people who will look back in ten years and remember that moment as the good old days in their careers. Its hard not to feel certain affection for a film be-heading, disembowelment, or appendage severing. We love all of it for the craft as much as the shock, but, enough is enough. When gore is all a movie can offer you, well, its time to start asking for more.

Premutos is a foreign splatter epic that made a lot of noise with horror fans because of its over the top grue, which, if it has anything, it has gore. The story has something to do with an ancient evil being loosed and bringing the dead back to life and eventually the end of the world. Old Premutos has to possess someone and take their body and start with the raising of the dead so he can be all Mr. Evil-Pants and do whatever it is that Ultimate Evil does. Naturally there are some reluctant heroes to come in and fight back the hordes of Hell and give humanity one last shot at defeating this monster. But can anyone stop the evil that is Premutos?

A friend of mine bought this ages ago on the reputation it had for being the goriest movie ever, which, honestly, is almost like an annual award. Its handed out at least as many times as The Best Movie Youll See This Year is given to any number of mainstream films. My friends dug it, saying it was fun, but me, not so much. Its enthusiastic, I will give it that. And its gory. And the movies that must have inspired the filmmakers are pretty boss, and its obvious that they are giving homage to the movies that made them want to make movies. Butnone of this makes Premutos good. Its a watch with a lot of friends and laugh and enjoy the gore movie, and if thats what it was meant to be, then fine. It nails that. But good it is most certainly not. The story lives and dies, at least this one, by its characters and actors are not just bad but awful. I can forgive the lack of any sort of an interesting plot (this is a gore film, and believe me, love Fulci though I may, I can admit that most of his movies were style and not substance), but its that the actors kill any mood or momentum there is. Ah, but perhaps thats due to the voice actors dubbing this film. Maybe thats the gag, that the dubbing is so bad that it makes the movie better. If thats the ideait didnt work. Not for me. I think, in the end, it was that the movie was trying to be too much of everything. Too silly. Too gory. Too much of an homage. Take a movie like Evil Dead 2. Its silly, and its gory, and its over the top, but the lead is compelling as hell and they still managed to make a creepy movie.

As horror-comedy, its ok. But the thing is, I kinda wonder if it was meant to be as funny as it is. I get the idea that it was supposed to be shocking and over the top and, well, it really isnt. I give them huge props for some really fun gore. Very well done considering they couldnt have had much of a budget to work with and they did a really good job. I just cant recommend this as more than a goof. I admire anyone who goes out and makes any movie, because its infinitely harder than it seems and sometimes should be. I just cant say that this is good or that I liked it, as, well, neither of those things is true. Gory movies are fun, but after a while, I got to wanting more in a movie. Good heavens? Did I grow up somewhere along the way? AHHHH!

c




5 out of 10 Jackasses
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